The Official First Draft

Today, I finished the Official First Draft.

It's not perfect. Not nearly. But all the plot lines, are, I think, coherent. The voice is mostly strong and consistent, at least as strong as I'm capable of at this point.

But, since my very first note on this whole thing almost 7 months ago, I'm starting to think that there might be the slimmest of slim chances that it might be published. Whether self or with a small publisher, I don't know, but I finally believe enough in the story and the characters and my ability to see something through this far to say that with some confidence.

It's on the Kindle and the Kindle Bot is reading it to me aloud. This begins the second-pass edit. I'm beside myself with excitement.

Some stats of a new type:

Title: The Travelers
Genre: Young Adult Sci-Fi/Paranormal-ish Romance
Word Count: ~80,000 words or ~325 pages
A little bit about it:  The only remarkable things about bored, directionless high school senior Annika Fitzsimmons are the painful dreams she has night after night and the boy with blue eyes she always sees in them. During winter break, a visit to her grandmother reveals that Nik's future lies in Traveler's City. What she doesn't know is that her arrival there will change everything.


Listening to: The Travelers Playlist. I'll organize and post an updated version here soon. :)
Obsessed with: My first draft read by the KindleBot. LOVE. IT.

I'm still looking for betas, and I'll be contacting those of you who expressed willingness/interest soon. If you're still around, thanks for reading. :)

Editing: Trimming the Fat

I've written several incarnations of the Big Dramatic Scene Where Everything Changes (one of them, at least). I had poured my heart into each of them, found it difficult to delete even a single sentence, and so all of them remained smooshed together in the Scrivener doc with random tags like: ***REWRITE THIS!!!**** or ***ANOTHER IDEA**** or *!!!THIS ONE'S A KEEPER!!!* So today I began the hard work of separating them, rewriting some twistier twists and fillers, and separating the fat from the meat (there is a lot of fat.)

Edited: One scene, about 600 words axed (whew!)
Listening to: "Happiness" by the Fray. Again. On a loop. Seriously, this song is INCREDIBLE.
Obsessed with: Finishing this edit. I seriously can't keep my hands away from the keyboard. And that's a good thing.

Editing: What's the Worst That Could Happen?

It's been awhile. I've totally stalled on this blog over the last month, namely because I've been trying to balance moving into a new house (!!!) with doing a first-pass edit on this WIP (!!!) and something had to go on the back burner.  Most nights, I'd type some words, stumble into bed, and pass out. No time to do a rehash of the day's writing work. Or, as I've learned to say, I didn't make it a priority.

The triumph? I continued to work on the project nearly every day. (In addition to feeding my children, keeping the house clean, hosting a few little parties, etc. of course.) It's a bonafide first draft now, with, I think it's safe to say, all of the plot points solidly in place, and all characters where they're supposed to be. That is, until the second edit.

Most of the work I've been doing over the past month or so since I've posted has involved making things very, very bad for my characters. I had a decent story before I read this incredible, inspirational blog post by Natalie Whipple, but it had such a big influence on me that I started asking myself at every turn of the story - "This is a bad situation for my characters, but could it be any worse?" If the answer was "yes," then I made that worse thing happen. I think the story is a lot more compelling now. So, thanks, Natalie. (I have a girl/writer/mom crush on you and I wish we were besties.)

So here's a rundown of where I stand, writing-wise. I have 36 chapters and the draft is hovering right around 76,000 words, or about 300 pages. My main worries are that I've written a Mary Sue that everyone will hate, that the story sags in the middle, and that some things about the writing make this a non-page-turner (one being that I use third person tense, which is not that popular for YA right now.) I'm working under a quasi-deadline to have a draft manuscript to someone in the next couple weeks or so.

Here's where I stand, future-wise. I feel like I've invested too much time and energy - almost seven months of writing every day - to just store this baby in my drawer. I have a contact who is high up in the food chain of a small, up-and-coming publisher, and he's requested a full manuscript just as soon as I'm ready to let it out into the world. The sooner the better, he says. I told him I'd have it to him two and a half weeks ago.

I'm pretty sure the writing sucks. I'm pretty sure some characters are flat. I'm pretty sure it's not an intriguing story. Which is all a way of saying: I'm pretty sure he's not going to want it. (I'm not one for self-promotion, can you tell?)

Then, I'm at a crossroads. I could just sock it in a drawer and fondly remember the seven months that Nik and Davis were my constant companions, and congratulate myself on writing a story/book/whatever when most people only dream of getting that many coherent words all together at once. I could shop it out to small publishers or even agents, which I understand takes even more time and energy and a lot of stress. Or I could self-publish it in e-format and feel like it's out in the world. If you have your own Amazon page with a book with your name on it, maybe that's some small kind of accomplishment, even if you're ranked 118,487 in Kindle rankings. Or maybe I put it up there on Amazon for free and let any good reviews make me feel happy and accomplished.

I'd love to hear what you'd do next.

Time for stats:
Edited: 10 chapters in the past week (!) Yeah, I love this part.
Listening to: "Happiness" by the Fray. A hauntingly beautiful song about the elusive and stunning nature of happiness.
Obsessed with: Cilantro.

(If anyone is still reading this, thanks. Love you to pieces.)

Obsessive

I'm in the dreaded rewriting phase of this whole business.  I know, I've been saying editing, but really it's more revising or rewriting or...whatever (DNA writers just put up this fab post explaining the difference.)

I have a very one-track mind.  When I do something, I REALLY do it.  David (lovingly) calls it "an obsessive personality," and unfortunately for our firstborn, he inherited it from me.  It's how I got through rabbinical school remembering so much (yeah, I'm a rabbi.  Have we been over this?), and it's how I got 80,000 words of a rough draft pounded out in five months in just a few hours a week.

Anyway, the significance for this particular moment in our lives is that I have been frantically unpacking the house since we moved in ten days ago.  Every day I tell myself I'm going to squeeze a little writing/editing into the middle of the day, while the children nap, and it just doesn't happen.  I get so obsessed with hanging skirts or organizing toys or hanging pictures that I'm completely exhausted by the time David gets home, and I collapse.

Of course, I would have given up everything for the writing if that's what I really wanted to be doing. But, between you and me, my draft has been acting a little funny.  It's not the book I fell in love with.  My clumsy writing is making an incredible story look kind of awkward and boring.  Some days I think my twist isn't twisty enough. Some days I want to cry because I am terrified I'm writing a Mary Sue and everyone knows that people can't handle more than one of those pretty much ever, and Bella Cullen already fantastically fills the role.  Some days I think that OMG there is NO tension in this POS.  Some days I am so in love with the Boy that I'm terrified my writing will never do him justice (or maybe I just don't want to share him with anyone.)

And so I've been avoiding the draft. I don't want to talk to it about its problems, I just want it to go to rehab on its own accord. Or find a new author who can make it into something better.  Since I know it will do neither, I'm buckling down again.  But maybe I should just download the latest version of Scrivener first....

The TWIST! We have a TWIST!

Friends, I'll say it.  I was a little worried for the end of my WIP and how all the conflict was going to be tied up, and sort of resolved, in an interesting, shocking way.

I think I've got it.  I couldn't feel more relieved.

And not a moment too soon.  Serious.  Because I have to buckle down on this sucker like mad now.

All I'll say is that I owe it all to JJ Abrams and his flash of brilliance at the turn of the century.

Words Written: Oh, I have no clue.  More tomorrow.
Listening to: "Belief" by Gavin DeGraw.  Totally an important theme in my WIP, by the way.
Obsessed with:  The scene in The Hunger Games when Katniss remembers the first time she met Peeta (pg 25, you know you want to read it again.)  Absolutely heartbreaking.

-1584 Words and Faux Humility

 Writer friends, I am honest-to-God editing. For the first time, I am losing words.  Like a long overdue haircut, it feels really, really good.

You know how you read all those writing-blog posts about how to make your book snappier and more exciting, and draw readers in from the get go, like this fabulous recent one from my wish-she-was-my-friend Kiersten?  And how they always say, "Cut your first chapter, because you don't really need it?"  And how you're all, "Hmmm, I'm sure that's really great advice, I'll really have to consider that when I'm editing."  But then when you actually get to editing, you're all, "Whoa, I'm sure that's great advice for most writers, but my first chapter is flawless and not boring at all and also one hundred percent completely necessary?"  But then one of your betas gives you some excellent, lovingly scathing critique, and guess what she says?

Just guess.

"Cut the first chapter."

Unh.........

Anyway.  I cut a lot of the first chapter, and rewrote the rest of it.  So I lost about 3000  words and wrote a new 1200 or so.  And I have to say - it felt good.  Really good.

But you know what felt better?

I sent the revision to my Very Important Friend in the Publishing Industry and guess what?  No, guess.

He asked for a full.  A FULL.  As in, "Please send me your whole freaking book, because I maybe might want to think about publishing it."

Needless to say, I am freaking out.  I have a month to pull everything together, and I'm so excited and baffled and.....whoa.

Anyone want to beta?  (eeek)


Words written:  -1584
Total Words: 76658
Listening To: (or rather, watching) ALIAS, Season 2
Obsessed with:  THE ROYAL WEDDING OMG

2222 Words in 3 days, and Editing -While-Writing Gives Way to a New Acronym

Hello, friends.

So I told you in my last post how I'm finishing up writing the end of my first draft while going back and editing/beta-ing the first chapters.  I know, I know.  I've read all the advice, times one hundred ad nauseum, about How I'm Supposed to Do This:  write the whole draft, shelve it for a couple of weeks, then go back and start reading again.  I understand the wisdom of that, really I do.  But that's not how it worked out for me, and you know what?  I'm actually finding this whole writing-while-editing thing kind of awesome.  Going back and reading the beginning reminds me of little details I may have forgotten I already included, and it helps me keep characters consistent, or update them as I go.  Plus, it's given rise to a new acronym that I can just insert for myself when I want to make sure I rewrite something:

FTLOGPRWT  (For the love of G-d please rewrite this.)

Good times, friends, good times.

Words Written:  2222 (in 3 days)
Total Words: 78242
Chapters Edited: 2
Listening To: The Pride and Prejudice Soundtrack.  Delicious.
Obsessed with: the sunshine that stubbornly shines between storms here in Dayton.  Monday's forecast said, "A Very Rough Week Ahead," and this sunshine is out to prove it wrong.  Thank God.

6000 Words in 17 Days (Yikes!)

So, since my last post, a LOT has happened.  My sweetie baby sister got married, for one, and I was the matron of honor, and my kids were all in the wedding party to boot.  Fun/craziness!

(isn't she beautiful?)

Passover hit, which entailed at least two full days of cleaning, cooking, prepping, dressing children, and driving to/attending Seders (thanks to the two fabulous families that hosted us!)


My sweetie baby girl turned ONE!



Um....anyone who is actively writing a novel want to beta for me?  I'll do the same for you!  Puh-leeese?

Here are the stats.  For 17 days (oy):

Words written: 6000-ish
Pages edited: 45-ish
Total Words: 76020
Obsessed with: Matzah, butter, and honey.  Go try it, right now.  Now.
Listening to:  "Hesitate" by Steve Moakler.

2189 Words in 6 Days and a Beautiful Disaster

I have reached my word count goal.

The only problem?  The story's not finished.  (Seriously?  How?)

It is a disaster, but it is mine, and it is so beautiful.  The unfinished parts are kind of important and scattered, unfortunately, throughout the story.  I have to tie up maybe one of the most important conflict lines without making it feel rushed.  I have to do that while still leaving plenty of room for the next book in the series to latch on.  I have to decide whether, where and how my MC and the boy she loves are going to Do It, and whether there will be fallout, and what that will be, and whether that will ruin the next book, or whether I'll just keep that for the next book where it probably really belongs.  (I don't think they will Do It, by the way, although at the outset I did and I kindasorta wrote the scene.)

And I'm still adding new twists!  And heartbreaking scenes!  And great details!  Oh, I'm so in love.

The new goal is 84,000 words in the first draft, which works out to 14 chapters of 6,000 words.  Obviously, I'll keep you posted. 

Here are the stats.

Total words: 70682
Listening To: "Confidence" by Teddy Geiger (EMO!!!)
Obsessed with:  Harry Potter 7.1 on DVD next week Omigod!!!!!!

3000-ish words in 4 days and the Bittersweet Not-Quite-End

For some reason, this week has been an incredible blur, and I have collapsed, fast asleep, with my computer more than once.  I could tell you the reason, but it would bore you.  Really!

When I started this little fun project, I set a goal of 70,000 words for a first draft.  That is in clear sight, but I am nowhere NEAR finished.  So, it's exciting, but not.

Words written since Sunday: 2940
Total Words: 68493
Listening To: The Benjy Davis Project
Obsessed with: Harry Potter

It Takes a Village to Write a Novel

This morning was as crazy a Shabbat morning as they come.  By 7:15 AM I had retrieved all the children from their beds and schlepped them back to the Big Bed, changed three diapers andthree little bottoms were clamoring for the same space in the crook of my arm.  At 7:30 my phone chirped that it had a text message for me.  I rolled my eyes and wondered who was trying to communicate with me at this ungodly hour.  A few minutes later, the ringtone reserved for my sister answered the question. 
"Good morning, Auntie Al," I slurred, ducking away from a chocolate donut the baby was trying to shove into my mouth. 
"I have a massage appointment today, but I'd rather sit home and cuddle with the dog.  And I have to go to Wal-Mart.  You can take it if you want." 
"Let me think about it," I said, watching the melee unfold before me. 
Two hours later, I had to start getting dressed if I was going to make it to the appointment.  "Should I go?"
"Yeah, hon, go."  My husband's face was calm amidst a storm of flying toys and screaming children that would unsettle most adults.  I raised an eyebrow at him.   "No, seriously, go.  I'm fine." 

An hour later, I was undressed and sandwhiched between two giant electric blankets on a massage table.  Renee told me she was going to do a lot of stretching and deep-tissue massage, and instructed me to let her know if she was massaging too hard.
"I don't think that'll be a problem." I informed her. "Just...could you dim the lights?  And do you mind if I listen to this audiobook?"
I spent the next hour being blissfully man(woman?)handled and listening to Shiver in the warm darkness.  It is hard to say who I love most today: my sister, my husband, Maggie, or Renee.  They all conspired to make me relax and they WON.

I spent the rest of the day ducking flying toys and random foodstuffs and  the serving as the choicest seat in the house once again.  After the massage, though, I had a much better attitude about it all.  I even managed to tap out something substantial while juggling the little gremlins sweeties. (See?)

Words Written Today: 678
Total Words: 65,553
Listening to: "Change" by Taylor Swift
Obsessed with: Fruit candied popcorn from the mall.  The green ones.

Getting Back in the Game - Did You Know Moving is Hard?

Hello, friends.  (Is anyone out there?  Doesn't matter. :))

I half-moved two weeks ago.  From Kansas to Ohio (yay!) but still an hour west of my final destination while we wait for our house to open up.   So we're staying with my parents (sort of boo!) for the meantime.  My husband is staying in our city of destination (BOO!) which means I am even more completely responsible for the three rugrats than I normally am.  I've also been trying to scout out some gainful employment in our new-old town, and that's been taking up a lot of time and even more psychic energy.

I'm sorry to say that I have failed the Project 365 for writing, but only for a couple of days.  For my own sake, I'm going to pretend that they didn't happen.  I'm exhaustedly typing a few words here and there on my phone, and that's fine.

Today I wrote 79 words.  And that's kind of a lot these days.

The next few weeks are looking clearer (knock wood) and I'm hoping to get back to this on a daily basis.  If you're still out there, thanks for reading.

2770 Words in 2 Days, and Avoidance

We are moving this week.  Movers are coming to our house on Wednesday, and they will pack all our things and put them in boxes and drive them somewhere where they will sit on a truck until May when our house is available.  We will pack all the stuff we need until then, our three children, and ourselves, into a car and drive from Kansas to Ohio.

To say the least, I have a lot to do.  So, naturally, I spent today writing almost 2000 words.  And playing around on wordle.net.

Words Written: 2770
total Words: 61,919
Listening to: "Change" by Taylor Swift
Obsessed with: My local library and its audiobook selection.  Incredible

Writing Scenes for the next in the Series

Oh, yeah.  I'm still here.  I've still been writing every day, though I won't lie - sometimes it was a pretty sketchy sentence via Evernote on my phone . I kid you not, one day it was three words.

We are moving house a week from today.  We found out my husband got a job offer in Ohio, back home, so we're going.  Things are insane.  I am beyond exhausted.  We are so excited.

In trying to flesh out these characters, I'm thinking more and more about their growth curve, and what their next steps will be.  I've written a pretty powerful scene, full of indecision mixed in with contentment mixed in with fear, but I'm pretty sure it belongs in the next book in the series. 

I know, I need to finish the first draft of the first book first.  Then edit it, tear it apart, turn it inside out, give it to twelve beta readers, then edit it five more times before I even think about showing it to anyone else.  But what could I say?  I couldn't help it, so it's tucked safely away for book #2.  If that ever comes.

Total Words: 59573
Obsessed with: Chipotle.  Yes, again.

I'll Bet You Thought I Was a Goner

You know how when things in your life are completely insane (maybe even in a good way) and you tell people "Things here have just been crazy." and they nod enthusiastically and say, "Oh, yeah, things are crazy by us too," and you smile and nod and try not to get really angry at them just because they have no concept of what "crazy" means, at least not compared to your life right now?

Yeah.

We just found out a week ago that we are moving to Ohio.  In two weeks.  The pros are that it's home, and we used to live there, so we know things about the neighborhood we want to live in, where to send the kids to school, where to do our grocery shopping.  The cons are that moving is still one of those situations where you throw all your cards up in the air and hope to God that they all fall into place, and you know they will eventually, but it still makes you really uneasy while those cards are dangling above your head and looking at you, saying things like "homeless."
On a related note, does house-hunting make anyone else totally crazed, and then for a few good minutes consider moving to Mongolia and living in a yurt like that lovely family in "Babies," because hey, they looked pretty happy?

Anyway.  I'll bet you thought I dropped off the face of the Earth and abandoned my sweet little novel, but in fact, I didn't!  I've been writing on it every day, even if that means pecking out a six-word sentence with one hand and wiping snot with the other, then falling face-first onto the keyboard, asleep.  (That has happened at least once, no joke.)  So I have a nine-day word count to share now which would normally be the same as a one-day, but the point of writing is to make progress, and sometimes we can make more progress than others.

Words written: 1789
Total Words: 57,410
Listening to:  My husband's alarm.  He has this terrible habit of never turning it off (NEVER) because he is so tired, so the damn thing just goes off constantly from 5-6 AM every day.  The main reason I'm hurrying to finish this post, actually.
Obsessed with:  "The United States of Tara."  Seriously, this show is INCREDIBLE!

If you're still around, thanks for sticking with me.  It's going to be a bumpy few weeks with possibly only intermittent updates, but I'm still committed to this project.

517 Words and Faling Behind

I'm falling behind!  Its really okay.  I'll explain why later.

Words: 517
Total Words: 56138

sosoSO tired.

255 Words, (a Rough Day,) and Plotting for the First Time Ever

Today was a super-rough day.  I had a phone call today that didn't go the way I had hoped, not even remotely so.  It was one of those, "hey, you should probably examine your self-worth, if you have any left.  Because you totally suck." kinds of calls.  Not in so many words, but at least that's what I took away from it.
So I spent a couple of hours crying.  Then my head hurt and my eyes were all burny and exhausted - you know the feeling.

And- I still hadn't done any writing, because I had been so stressed about the call before it happened! 
I had, however, done my very first bit of outlining for the book EVER!!!  I'm normally a "pantser" (plot/character as I go,) but for this subplot of the book I found that there were so many little pieces and details to get right that I had to sketch it out.  Hopefully I can start writing those bits in in the next few days.  When my eyes aren't so tired.

For a happy post instead of my Debbie-Downerisms, head over here to read the contributions to the  "Just Kiss Already" Event.  Squeeeeeeeeee!!!! You know I love the kissing scenes.

Words written: 255
Total Words: 55621
Listening to: You don't want to know.
Obsessed with: Ohio

775 Words and Homestretch wordle.

Now within 15,000 words of my goal, I've declaring this WIP in the Homestretch!  I did a wordle to celebrate:




It's a good thing that the MC's name is the biggest one - right?

Words Written: 775
Total Words: 55366
Listening to:  "How to Train Your Dragon"  Over and over and over again.
Obsessed with: Ohio.

392 Words and Lost in Action

So I know my antagonist's motivation, and know how my MC stands in the way  of her achieving her goal, but I'm really having trouble writing the steps in between and the action to fill it in.

Any tips for me?

Words Written: 392
*Exhausted*

1272 Words and I'm so spoiled.

I wrote 1272 words today.  It doesn't seem like that big of a deal until you consider that my 10-month-old is sprouting some huuuuge new teeth, and so most of my day was filled with dealing with this, and the piercing sounds that go with it:


On the upside, I am completely and totally spoiled.  Yesterday, I got two incredible presents from two different, awesome, people.  I've been pretty bummed in general lately, Elle knew, and hooked me up with the most incredible tangible and non-human thing about Columbus-Ohio.  Read about it here, you guys.  Incredible, emotional, and fattening.  Perfect.

Also, my husband hooked me up with an early Valentine's Day present.  It is a netbook so I can continue writing long after exhaustion has taken me to a permanently horizontal position each evening, and first thing in the morning for my semi-conscious ramblings.  He shrugs and says, "It's a glorified typewriter."  Which is incredible because that's exactly what I need.   I have never actually uttered the imbecilic words, "Hey honey, I'm writing a novel," but he knows everything about me.  Even the parts I would rather he didn't.  He is like the Jewish, handsome Sherlock Holmes of our relationship.  Yeah.  He even put Scrivener on the thing for me.  Love him.

Words written today: 1272
Total Words: 53022
Listening to: Some basketball game or another.  Not my favorite but he's earned it.
Obsessed with: Salty Caramel.  <3 you, Elle.